Another “7th” in the Books

Yesterday was the 7th.

And we are 7 months in.

And guess what?

I didn’t even realize it was the 7th until I was writing out a check.  I looked up at the calendar to check the date…and saw it right there.  7.

And I SMILED!

Up until this month I would wake up knowing it was the 7th and I could feel a cloud hanging on me all day long.  I would go to bed thinking “I survived another one.”

But yesterday was different!

Honestly, the weekend was different.

I have felt peace lately, but I have still struggled with that “cringe” at certain points – especially when I leave my house or come home…I think because I tend to see one of Stacey’s vehicles when I come or go.  I also tend to cringe when his cell goes off.

Saturday morning I woke up early.  I had plans with some friends to go out-of-town that morning to do something fun.  We left from my house.  And for nearly 5 hours I never once thought about the affair or the women.  Not when I left my house.  Not when I came home.  Not at all for nearly 5 hours!

I had been home for a while.  I was standing in the kitchen and something popped in to my head.

Here’s what it was: “I haven’t thought about the affair or S or M today!”

I remembered then that my counselor told me at the beginning that there would come a day when I would think, “hey, I haven’t thought about that in a while!”  And I thought then he was crazy.  I wondered how on earth I would ever face a minute of the day when I didn’t think about it.

But I had it happen!

He was right!

But then, Saturday afternoon we were at home, waiting to go out that evening as a family.  His cell went off.  I tensed up.  He saw.  And he got up, walked over to me, handed me his cell phone, and said “I don’t have anything to hide.  It’s ok.  I want you to look.”

That evening we went out as a family.  We had a great time.  We didn’t hold hands or anything, but with the kids that’s hard to do sometimes because they are hanging on me.  But at one point Hub & our son went to the restroom and my daughter & I were sitting and waiting on them.  They came back and Hub had stopped to get me an ice cream cone (we had already bought the kids a treat – so don’t worry about them).  To some that might not sound like much.  But, to me that was so sweet.  Because that meant he was thinking of me.  He knows I have a weakness for ice cream.

Like I said, Sunday morning was great, because for the first time I didn’t automatically know it was the 7th.  And then when I saw it was, I was able to smile about it.  And I didn’t think about it anymore that day.

The day was uneventful.

And my mind was at peace.

And that’s what I like.

A simple life and a quiet mind.

And my first peace-filled 7th in the books.

 

 

 

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